dammit

What?  Two days in a row?  What's gotten into me?

Other than moonshine, just the usual bullshit of putting up with jerks while commuting.  Here's a tip, sunshine, if you don't want people to hop on your back wheel, pass with a little more distance and don't cut someone off.  I know I hopped on, I did it solely to bug you.  The fact that it seemed to work convinced me to keep doing it.  Learn some fucking manner dipshit.

Current beer-scale: 5.9 and Friday moonshine a'coming.

at least you're trying

With a 15-month old I'm trying to stop using certain words.  The c-word had worked its way into my regular vocabulary before he was born, and that's probably a bad thing.  But some mornings the commute is so bad it's like riding through a retarded assholes convention and you can't help but let a few things slip you probably shouldn't.

I don't care if you're also on a bike, but if you run a red to turn and cut me off I'm going to throw a few words at you when I pass you.  If you drive a cab but don't feel like stopping at a stop sign, I'm going to tell you to go fuck yourself.  That's just the way things work.  It's hotter than balls out and everyone is going crazy.

Current beer-scale: 9.5, just like the temperature out.

Humpday grind

Ugh.

Almost got run over by some bearded douche walking home from daycare tonight. So I'm having a couple of these and trying to ignore the fact i have to go back to work tomorrow.

Current beer-scale: 9.0

when it rains

it pours.

Couple of flats last week, not a big deal.  But I used my back-up tube, and couldn't get a patched one to work on the trek over the weekend.  Okay, I can still ride.

Rode to work this morning, couldn't get into the bike corral.  Turns out, demolition on the building started two days earlier than posted, and the building is closed.  Which is fine, but my lock was in there b/c I thought I had the two days that was posted.  And was still posted on the door when I got there this morning.  Fan-fucking-tastic. 

So I took a nice long walk to Kozy's at lunch, picked up a new lock (b/c there's little to no chance I ever see the one I've been using again) and a few tubes.  Took forever, but I needed to be outside for an hour anyway.  Let's hope the rest of the week picks up a little bit. 

Current beer-scale: 9.2 & rising

Hey saddlebags

If you pass me on the right just to run the red at a six-way intersection, I should have the legal recourse to punch you in the face as I pass you. Especially when it happens at every. single. light.

Seriously man, you're harshing my holiday buzz.

Current beer-scale: 6.3

let's just say that was on purpose

A little wet this morning, perfect conditions to lay down a bit of a controlled skid when some asshat turns left directly in front of you.

ETA: Add another shitty rainy ride in the dark to come home and I've flat out had it for this week.

One more morning to go. Then it's beer & whiskey time!

Current beer-scale: 7.7

They Britta'd it

Fuck shit ass bugger motherfucker cunt dammit.

Current beer-scale: streets ahead.

they are everywhere...

I never noticed it until recently, but sometimes I think the world is trying to tell me something.

Is that the lakefront path calling me a noob? Should I take that personally? There do seem to be a lot out and about around this time of year.

Whatever. I'd rather laugh about this than rage at some asshole complaining in the sun-times about how tiny the road seems with a protected bike lane next to it.

Current beer-scale: 8.4

Ah Monday.

Spending the day like this is why Monday is so difficult.

I was trying to make my usual Monday adjustments this morning with a modicum of success. Got up a few minutes early to let the dog in the backyard as I tried to water the grass seeds we put down over the weekend. Took her on a real walk and despite not being able to breathe at points as my allergies went haywire I was feeling like I could approach this week with an open mind.

Then the wife calls to give me a heads up on avoiding some douchebag with a blonde ponytail out with a shepard off a leash. The dog actually bit her as she walked by and the guy couldn't do anything about it B/C IT WAS OFF ITS FUCKING LEASH! She was calling to warn me to stay on the other side of the street if I saw him while I was walking the dog, but all hearing her story made me want to do was actively search out the guy and give him a piece of my mind. Other than getting chomped fairly hard it sounded like she was okay but that's not cool. Didn't break the skin, didn't put any holes in work clothes, but still all I wanted to do was find that guy and put a hurt on him. Not a happy way to start a work week.

Things are closing in on normal again this morning after a long ride and getting some coffee brewing in the office. I'm wary of this week, with the car's 'check engine' light back on and a slew of late meetings messing up the schedule. I'm just going to cross my fingers and hope Friday gets here soon.

At least Miami didn't win last night.

Current beer-scale: 8.1

Wow. Blogger goes down for a few hours and I go from having a great afternoon/evening to getting clipped by some asshole making a u-turn this morning.


So I took a long ride up north yesterday to pick up an academic robe for tomorrow's ceremony. I've been getting ready for this event for weeks and the mere thought of it being close to finally over is making me smile. But before it's over I get to wear a gown that's at least 50 years old. Awesome.

But I capped off last night with a trip to the dog beach, always awesome. My favorite spot in the city on a night that felt more like summer than early May. Good times.


So I woke up happy this morning, happy it was Friday, happy the week was nearly over, happy I was on the bike, only someone decided morning rush-hour on Fullerton was a good time to swerve right into the bike lane then whip around and pull a bitch. Clipped my back wheel as I tried to get around him since I had no idea what he was doing. I'm fine but the wheel is severely out of true. Hopefully a trip to the shop tonite isn't full of bad news.

Damn. And I was feeling pretty great too. That's swirling down the toilet, and I just want to get out of the office and punch random people driving their retarded cars around. Ah Friday.

Current beer-scale: 9.6

So that commute sucked.

That's me walking frankenbike home down Fullerton last night. Almost fell off the bike as soon as I pushed off the curb leaving work when the free wheel spun free. Got a dirty look from the douche who almost ran into me from behind when I slowed down to not run over an old man and his dog crossing the path (did the guy not know what I meant by "watch out for the dog?"). Finally ended up walking the last few blocks when the free wheel seemed to completely crap out. Woof.

Even better, I got to spend most of that walk getting shadowed by the preaching van going "Blues Brothers" on me. Well, not just me, thankfully, but I listened to about all I could stand. At least the walk gave me time to call dutch bike and schedule a tune up for many, many weeks from now. The worst part is if you can't read them, some of the preacher's posterboards actually made sense. All in all the perfect capper to a crappy afternoon.

So the good bike is coming out tomorrow and staying out for a while. Whatevs. At least I'll be able to catch up to the next lycra freak who runs over a dog.

Current beer-scale: 8.6

The shift is starting

Or rather, the shit.

Got honked at this morning for standing at a stop light at a red light. Apparently I was in the way of someone who wanted to turn right and needed me to move. Should I ignore the no turn on red signs and step out of my dedicated bike lane area, just to let some dick in a car turn? I didn't think so. He got a shrug and had to wait another 15 seconds. After which he gunned it through the light. Color me impressed guy, you sure can stomp on a gas pedal with the best of them.

As ready as I am for nicer weather I have come to enjoy the quiet of being one of the few bikes on the road lately. But my commute's going to get a lot longer in the near future, and I'll gladly put up with more people in bike lanes with me to get the sun out longer.

Current beer-scale: 8.1

Time to take a breath

And maybe even a break. Nerves are getting frayed.

There were a lot of cops out last night for whatever reason, and that included two on bikes behind me, then in front of me, then behind me again on Chicago as I left work. And I wasn't running any reds, these guys were just screeching up to the light after I got there, shoaling me, then just standing there as the light changed so I'd pass them, only to get shoaled again at the next light. The last time, the one on the left (of course the were riding side by side) stood directly in front of me and angled his bike across my lane. Screw it, I ran the light and got as far away from them as I could. It's not like they fucking cared. They were happy spinning away with their lights on.

For reasons again beyond my comprehension, traffic was heavy this morning. Cars were backed up and I was taking it easy going down Wells. In this case 'easy' meant 90% stopping at stop signs just to make sure no one was coming through. Of course some ass on a hybrid zooms right past me at one when there's an suv in the middle of the intersection. She slams on her brakes, he gives her a wave, only now she's stopped directly in front of me and waiting for me to pull the same shit. We'd still be sitting there staring at each other if I hadn't waived her through. I didn't have any choice, when she stopped I had to put a foot down. Eventually that lady's going to t-bone some bike commuter b/c she's tired of looking for them, and I can only hope it's the same idiot that pulled the douche-y move this morning.

Shit like this happens all the time. But when it bugs me to the point where I'm wishing physical harm would come to people on bikes then I think it's time to get away for a while. And I mean away away. It's not like taking the train instead of the bike is going to make me feel better at all. Grrrrrrrrrrrr.

Current beer-scale: 9.9

Ah, such a picturesque scene. You almost can't imagine nearly getting run over by the 66 Chicago bus. No, you're right ms. bus driver, honking and speeding by w/inches to spare is a fine way to handle traffic conditions.

Fuck you.

Current beer-scale: 8.1

Rather one-sided for a philosophical conversation

You would think someone with pro-life stickers plastered all over their car would be better drivers. At least you'd think they'd pay more attention at stop lights. But no, apparently ever life is sacred unless you're late for work. Then it's every fucker for themselves.

Not that I blame them. I don't give a shit about the people inching along in cars, and I accept the fact they don't give a shit about me. But after nearly getting run down multiple times this morning, the last thanks to said pro-lifer completely running a red light, I'd like to take a bazooka and clear some traffic on the way home tonite. Especially if anyone is pig-headed enough to go all bumper-sticker philosophy on me.

Ultimately this had to happen. Saturday and Sunday were too good to not have some sort of Monday letdown. I didn't think that would mean nearly getting killed though.

Current beer-scale: 9.8

learning experience

I saw a great looking bernese mountain dog on the way to work this morning. Unfortunately, I saw her while she was wandering across the lakefront path with people coming at her from both directions. I managed to slow down and stay out of the way, but that was with barely avoiding getting rear-ended by the chick behind me.

Whether she owned her or not I don't know, but the woman walking the dog was all the way down the beach at the water politely calling for her dog who was about to get creamed by someone. I had enough room to turn and call her a fucking moron, but that wasn't quite enough for how mad I was at the situation. Of course it's still uber-nice for the middle of October and all the speed freaks are back out, if a dog got in the way of their morning time trial I would wager that's all she wrote for the dog. It pissed me off.

Even worse, I still feel bad about it. That dog was just doing her own thing, happy and oblivious to what she was doing. Just b/c I managed to avoid hitting her doesn't mean she was safe with all those other bikers and runners out. What I should have done was come to full stop and shoo'd the dog back to the beach, that way I'd know she was alright. That would have given me an excuse to give the lady walking her a larger, louder, more profanity-laced piece of my mind too, which I think would have made me feel much better. Not everyone should be allowed to own a dog, and if you're letting it walk across a busy street or path, you're in that group.

Current beer-scale: 8.1, shit-ily high for a Monday AM

ow.

I wish I had that on video.

I've been riding to work for almost 4 years. Had a few close calls, a few minor incidents, but never anything major. Today I got doored on the way home. Flipped completely over the bars, rolled a bit and skidded to a stop on my left elbow and the back of my head. Ow.

The scary thing was I saw it coming but there was nothing I could do. The timing was just too perfect; I saw the door opening and yelled a heads up, but couldn't slow down or get left enough in time. Watched the driver turn to look at me as the right brake hood slammed into the door and over I went.

I *think* my right hand was still braking when I hit the door, and that's the only thing that really hurt. I have some scrapes and bruises, mostly on my knees and elbows but that's it. I was a little concerned my right middle finger was broken but I'm less worried by now.

The bike wasn't in the best shape. The brake hood was jacked, and the front wheel was bent enough to rub against the brake and stop. In the "I have always depended on the kindness of strangers" department, REI was able to "magic" the wheel back into reasonable shape for no charge a few hours later. Hopefully that will keep for long enough for me to find a job and be able to afford a new rim.

That looks a little off to me...

I had my phone out by the time I was getting up off the pavement and dragging my bike to the sidewalk. Called the cops, asked the guy if he had insurance and told him to stay where he was. Of course he didn't have insurance, so on top of getting issued a citation for opening his door into me he also got ticketed for that. The cop on the scene was actually pretty great and made the whole thing a little more bearable.

A copy of the incident report and a court summons if I decide to follow up w/any charges

Hours later I'm still pissed though. People call getting doored a rite of passage but I could have gone without, thanks. On top of dealing with getting laid off and the stress of interviews, I'm not in the best head-space to deal with this right now (I will be sure to wear short sleeves tomorrow to show off my damage, but that's another matter).

If dooring really is a rite of passage, it makes me wonder how inevitable it really is and if there isn't anything else someone can do to make sure it doesn't happen again. I know the majority of my environment is really out of my control but the powerlessness of the situation is ulimately what bothers me. I think I handled the situation about as well as possible; made sure the cops came, had the guy cited, kept my cool, but the fact that it happened at all makes me crazy. Plus I feel I have an increased amount of pent up aggression now but a right hand that doesn't like making a fist right now so I'm just grinding my teeth.

I'm still riding to work tomorrow. Why? B/c fuck it, that's why. Yes that was awful. Yes, I will probably be thinking of how it felt to go flying through the air for a while. As my head was scraping across the street before I came to a stop, all I could think was "at least I have a helmet on." That's not a memory I'll lose any time soon. But all things considered I'm probably lucky with how things turned out. I made it through a crash and right now I feel pretty good. I described it to my wife as just feeling like I had played a little football yesterday. My bike isn't in perfect shape but it's still rideable. If I let today scare me off of riding tomorrow, who knows when the next bike commute will be.

So the next one will likely be tomorrow. Now for another drink. I have a feeling the adrenaline flush from earlier will make it pretty easy to sleep tonite, but a few cocktails won't hurt either.

Current beer-scale: 8.9

coincidence vs trending

Twice in three days, someone's come down a one-way street by the new place the wrong way. Two different people too, b/c they both had very different reactions to my slowing down on the bike to stare at them. One flicked me off and called me a douchebag, one kept driving like he didn't even see me. And he probably didn't. I've had a good run of city-cycling lately, while not really enjoying the shorter commute it's easy enough to stretch for longer rides. It never hurts to have a reminder that people are jerks though.

What's easier, going around the block or seeing a one-way and still turning the wrong way into it anyway? Which is easier, making three lefts or pulling a bitch in the middle of a busy intersection? Which is more important, you getting through a light when you're already late for the cubs game, or not running over pedestrians at the crosswalk? It shouldn't be that difficult to figure out.
Current beer-scale: 8.7

rethinking the plan

I love this city. In the right circumstances, when someone almost runs you over to turn against traffic and cut through a parking lot/alley combo, only to say "Hey, you should try stopping brah," there is a 100% probability that they'll end up stopped themselves by traffic when they get to whatever street they're cutting to. So I-er, you-can feel free to trail after them and play the game that's sweeping the nation, "Guess who had the right-of-way!"

And in my case, it's a chance to take care of my serious case of "Last-word-itis," where if the guy hadn't said anything and just pulled into the parking lot, I wouldn't have thought twice. But hearing him say I should stop, when I've got the right of way with the flow of traffic, and he's pulling the dick move of cutting through a parking lot anyway, then I'm following him to give him some choice words. Which took a lot less time that I thought it might, and actually got the guy into a frothing rage as I turned back around to head home. All in all, good times.

It also made me re-think my plan for showing up for dinner on my bike but sans helmet, all cool in street clothes. I'm always in street clothes anyway, but that way I don't have to carry the helmet home. Today made it clear to me that it's worth having to carry a helmet home when who knows is going to be driving out there with you. Helmet it is. And now, off to dinner.

Current beer-scale: 9.0

Buy a fucking leash!

This is hard to say w/o sounding melodramatic, but while my own dog makes my commute start a little later, this morning someone else's dog nearly wrecked it altogether.

I don't really care to show up on-time on Sundays, so I extended things a little this morning. The plan was to stay on the path until the chess pavilion, then take the tunnel back into the neighborhood. Of course, someone was calling their dog from the North Ave bridge and it came screaming across the path to catch up to them.

I saw him coming and was able to stop in time, probably about 18 inches away from where this dog came running across. Close enough to send pictures of the lab that got run over at the tour a few years ago through my head, but not so close it was in danger of actually happening to me.

Watch that video. Look at the dog get up and limp away in slow motion. I'd like to headbutt the guy who let that dog actually get on the road like that, and I feel bad for not doing it to the douche calling his dog this morning. Did he think that was funny? Does he care so little for both his dog and the other people on the path that he can just let the dog run wild? Even thinking about it now I get overly worked up. That dick deserves to run over by a truck, so his dog can find a better home.

I'm going to take a deep breath now, and finish listening to the cardinals self-destructing in the first game of today's double-header. See, there's always a bright side...sometimes you just have to look a couple places for it.

Current beer-scale: fucking high