The real miracle of the internet age is that if you're looking to buy something specific, you'll find it eventually if you know where to look. Specifically, I was looking for a wind trainer in Chicago that I could pick up cheap and not have to worry about shipping. I found it earlier this week, and won it on ebay for 50 bucks. 
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I picked it up this morning and set up was easier than I expected. Before getting the bike on, the hardest part was setting up the second bedroom to function as more than just the treadmill room.
This
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eventually turned into this
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Not too bad. Putting the raleigh in with its bolt-on wheels was a little tricky but I think it will work. A riser for the front wouldn't be a bad idea either if it helps steady the set up, I never have the most faith in my balance sitting still. 
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Again, a good way to fill some time and get riding again. It's entirely possible all it will take to get a job offer is finding a different way to keep riding, but until then at least I can ride.
Current beer-scale: 4.1